lately it’s felt like my final days of school.
i’d given up by then, i wrote so on my english final, there’s no point in trying, mrs teacher, tomorrow all we’ll have are memories of each other. We’ll pass each other in grocery aisles, you won’t wonder if my mind still has the capacity to write papers, i won’t wonder if your still handing out the same assignments. She gave me a ‘C’ cause she didn’t want to see me ruin myself.
for a while there it felt like i was four again.
the world shrunk back to what was in eyesight of me. i didn’t travel anywhere or speak to anyone who didn’t live within a phone call to say, boil water for tea. I rethought everything, but chose to only sweeten conversations with simple pleasantries. i wrote everything down this time, i didn’t want to make the same mistake of forgetting it all again, as i had when i’d turned five and started school for the first time, becoming malleable.